Boundaries and People Pleasing
Empowering You to Stop People Pleasing: Sage Counseling and Wellness Services
Maybe you’ve had a tough time lately in your personal life and you want to stand up for yourself or learn when to say no.
You want to set boundaries and actually stick to them without people pleasing and giving in.
Or maybe you want to find that balance between assertive and aggressive or assertive and passive.
You can do all of these things through setting boundaries and using assertive communication!
I’ve helped many individuals become more assertive in their lives.
Want to make an appointment with a therapist to help you set boundaries?
Transform Your Relationships with Sage Counseling and Wellness: Setting boundaries or being assertive with
- Your family
- Toxic friendships
- Relationships
- Your work life
- Your social calendar
- Pursuing your dreams
- Your verbal and nonverbal behavior
- Confrontation
- Saying no without guilt
If you don’t feel confident in the above topics, assertiveness training to set boundaries may be a great fit for you!
Self Discovery: After working together, you’ll be able to
- gain better awareness of your concerns in each aspect of your life
- be kind to yourself, know what you want and take better care of you
- feel less imposter syndrome
- notice less people pleasing
- better understand how and when to set boundaries that work for you
- stop settling and feel confident in your own skin, going after what you want, even if it scares you a bit
- respect and honor other people’s boundaries and their realities
- present yourself confidently in your personal and professional life
- express your ideas in a calm and articulate way
- understand the difference between being passive, passive aggressive, aggressive and assertive
What can happen if we continue to people please and not set boundaries?
- It can be really difficult to be assertive for yourself and towards others
- Feeling exhausted, stressed and/or anxious due to people pleasing
- Possible guilt for not taking care of yourself and putting others first
- May have low self-esteem and confidence
- Feelings of not being understood or respected
- Trouble stating your wants and needs
- Struggle in friendships and relationships
- Have trouble being an effective communicator
- Lack satisfaction in your work life or school life balance
I used to have trouble being assertive too.
I would shy away from sharing my true thoughts, feelings, and opinions. People would say that I was so polite, well-mannered, obedient, among other similar words because I wouldn’t share how I felt about a certain situation. I would often feel frustrated and resentful because people couldn’t read my mind, when I hadn’t even spoken my mind.
It took time to become more assertive, and it’s something I still work on today. I now feel confident in saying no if something doesn’t work for me whether because I’m not interested or because it doesn’t work with my schedule.
Does this sound like you too?
What can you expect in sessions?
First, you will attend a 80 minute intake session where we’ll explore your background history and we’ll set some tentative goals. Then we’ll schedule out a few future 50 minute sessions to start working on your goals.
Sessions occur online as we explore your concerns, possibly using books/workbooks or creative means, process life together, and at times have homework to make sure your new skills stick.
Let’s work together to hit your goals and feel confident in your decisions to take better care of you.
What Comes Next
Schedule a free 15-minute consultation call with the therapist you would like to work with or fill out our potential client form here. From there, you will set up your first session, also known as an intake session. With your chosen therapist, let them know a bit about your concern, your history with past treatment, ask about our fees, and the best days and times to attend therapy sessions.
Fees
Each therapist at Sage Counseling and Wellness has their own fee structure. When you have the initial consultation call with your therapist, you will discuss your fee with them.
Our therapists do not participate in-network with any insurance companies. Clients pay their therapist each time they come to a session and are then emailed an insurance-compatible statement at the end of each month to send to their insurance companies for out-of-network reimbursement called a superbill. Each insurance company varies on what reimbursement they give for psychotherapy out of network. You may want to check with your insurance company to find out what they offer for psychotherapy with a therapist with your therapist’s particular licensure in Georgia.
What Can I Expect at My First Therapy Appointment?
Many people have fears, assumptions, and at times, no idea at all about what therapy will be like the first time they come in for a first session. We would also encourage you to reach out and ask your therapist any questions you have about what therapy will be like with them.
Each therapist has their own way of approaching their work. But here are some things that may happen in your first session here at Sage Counseling and Wellness:
- When you start your first online appointment, you’ll be in the virtual waiting room.
- While you wait for your appointment, take a moment to breathe, look over any thoughts or items you’d like to share in the session, and perhaps take a restroom break beforehand so you can be fully present.
- As sessions are virtual, you can sit however you want to sit comfortably. Some clients prefer to sit at a desk, others in a comfy chair with a laptop or tablet, and some others sit on the floor on a yoga mat to stretch while in session. It’s completely up to you.
- In your first session, your therapist will likely remind you that what you talk about in session is completely confidential with a few legal and ethical exceptions, which will be explained to you (and which are outlined in our consent to treatment document). If you have any questions about those policies, you’re encouraged to ask!
- Your therapist might discuss any other policies they have (cancellation, payment, session length, scheduling, or other ‘frequently asked questions’). This all only takes a few minutes.
- Then, depending on the level of crisis that you’re currently experiencing, your therapist might review their particular style of therapy, discuss your intake form with you, begin a more thorough assessment of your history, or just ask you what brings you in at that particular time. From there on, it’s a conversation and there are no right or wrong things for you to say — the only thing you can do ‘wrong’ at that point is to be dishonest, and in doing so you would only slow down your progress. If there is something about your therapist that seems like it would get in the way of you feeling comfortable being honest, you can say so, and your therapist may be able to help you feel more comfortable. We want you to feel comfortable and confident with your therapist. If at any time you don’t, please let them know or let the director know.
- Your therapist may or may not take notes, depending on their treatment style. These notes are also confidential unless you consent to their release, and they are kept safely in our electronic health record system.
- Therapy is a safe space to show your vulnerability so crying is perfectly acceptable.
- You’ll pay for your session at the end, generally, via your credit card on file.
- You can discuss a regular meeting time with your therapist so that this time becomes your reserved time. This helps in accountability for you to work on your progress as well.